Now I've had some very long weeks in my life, but absolutely nothing compares to what I went through from May 29 to June 7, 2009. Death is nothing easy to deal with. In the back of your mind you wonder, why? Why him? Why her? Why now? It's a constant search for answers to questions that really don't have answers to. But when someone's life is taken tragically, when it's completely unexpected, its very hard to understand. Also, everyone deals with death differently. There is no right or wrong way, no guide or manual that tells you what you need to do to cope with someone's passing. You simply take each day as it comes and lean on the support of your family and friends.
The other night, someone at the Pug came up to me and told me something NOT to do at my brother's funeral: DON'T. TAKE. PICTURES. Don't take pictures of him lying in his casket. She said that I wouldn't have peace with him being gone because that image will always bring me back to how he died, not how he lived his life. The good times. That really hit me. You know what, she was absolutely right. Now, now a full week and a half after he died, I'm more at peace with him being gone. But boy, if I could have taken a picture of all the people who came to salute my brother. That church was absolutely packed! Standing room only. It was truly a celebration of his life. A fitting sendoff for a honorable young man who was loved by all.
Yesterday, we had the honor of accepting his high school diploma. A sad duty, indeed, but a celebration nonetheless. My brother was looking forward to this day. I'm sure he was jumping up and down and hi-fiving everyone up above. His school went out of their way to support us this past week. The faculty, staff, and students collected money and donated it to our family. A scholarship is being established in his name. The yearbook is being dedicated in his honor. Truly a testament to the wonderful life he lived.
So now the longest week of my life is now over. My heart is still heavy, I miss my brother dearly, but I am comforted in that he is in a better place and that I will see him once again when I go and meet my maker.
Good day!
1 comments:
Boy you should be writing a book or something Q, you tap into the soul of a man with the words you speak. You are the epitome of a stand up man, the type of cat all these young knucklehead dudes should emulate I can't express to you enough the joy I feel in just knowing you now my homie because the respect I have for you & the type of dude you are is limitless. Your brother's life was cut short but he will continue to live through you always, and always remember that...he is the soul and you are his body now (my grandmother once said something like that to me). I always say when talking to you how this situation makes me emotional well it's because I have an 18 year old baby brother which I told you about similar situation to yours as well, same father etc. and man I couldn't imagine taking a phone call of the magnitude of what you have recently had to deal with. But one thing it did make me do, I called him and told him take a weekend off and come out to Philly and spend some time with me, I just want to cherish the time just as you mentioned before. Weird thing is I just met you and didnt know your little brother but he is touching my life as well...again Q thank you for being a stand up man, you are the type of cat that will help this world get to the place it has to go to...1 love brother
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